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Jeremy Clarkson: Don’t Stop Behaving Badly

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Jeremy Clarkson 2008

So I was prowling news of the Empire (as in British) this morning when I came across this jewel from our old buddy, Jeremy Clarkson, famous in this country for his car show Top Gear. I found myself pumping the air repeatedly with my fist, yelling “Right on!”. I mean. look how this article starts off:

There have been many very different reactions to Max Mosley’s basement bunk-up. Some have been offended and some unmoved, but most people, since it’s so Carry On up the Khyber, have read the reports and sniggered.

Hmmm. I wonder if I’m alone in having a bit of respect for the man. I mean, there he is, a 68-year-old pensioner getting it on with five girls in the middle of the afternoon. Fair play to you, fella.”

I mean, Dayum!!!!

Not doing TV or newspapers anymore, about all I knew about Jeremy was from the Top Gear clips on Youtube. I particularly like this one where he gives a Toyota Prius what it deserves. My impression was of a crazy dude having lots of fun with cars and other things that make noise.

This Times article made me realize that Jeremy does more than have fun with cars in front of a camera. Off to google to see what we can find. A Wikipedia hit came up early. Completely out of character for Wikipedia, this article is good. Great, in fact. Had me shouting laughter at times. Like this for instance, regarding BMW and German cars:

During the 13 November 2005 Top Gear episode, a news segment featuring BMW’s Mini Concept from the Tokyo Motor Show showcased what fellow-presenter Richard Hammond quoted as a “quintessentially British” integrated tea set. Clarkson responded by mocking that they should build a car that is “quintessentially German.” He suggested indicators that displayed Hitler salutes, “a sat-nav that only goes to Poland” … and “ein fanbelt that will last a thousand years,”

A nose coffee moment for sure! His next statement (that I agree with) about “Das Environment” is equally enjoyable.

“I do have a disregard for the environment. I think the world can look after itself and we should enjoy it as best as we can”

Amen!

Anyway, back to his column. He makes a point that I think is very important. That is, what is this world going to be like after it has been Cloroxed into total bleached-out blandness? What’s the point of living if one can’t kick up his heels and color outside the lines every so often?

My theory is that this later-day goody-two-shoes crap that ties in with political- and enviro-correctness is simply those who can’t being angry and getting even with those who can. Nothing new there. Just another incarnation of greed and envy from the “Can’t” classes.

Here is what I propose to remedy the problem. Make it part of your daily routine to do something incorrect. Really Incorrect. Color outside the box. Cross the yellow line. Do something that is sure to cause a busy-body to bitch.

Me, I have a lot of catching up to do. Today I’m going to rummage around in the basement and set free some freon-12. I’m going to make some loud noise. I’m going to tread heavily on some forest dirt. I”m going to tell a racially insensitive joke. I’m going to find a spotted owl to shoot. I’m going to blow up something. Then there’s tomorrow and the next day.

Thanks, Jeremy, you made my day, reminding me what it means to live instead of merely exist!

Posted by neonjohn on July 16th, 2008 under Cars, Funny, Misc, Philosophy


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